5
"ah," he said.
He didn't like waking much.
"ah," she said. She didn't like waking him much. Each
was thinking every time he went to sleep whether that would be the
last time that he woke up. But it never was. And then when it was
you knew the nurse was really going to be sad and cry. And it wasn't
because the man was so pleasureable or anything but after living
with something for so long, even if you hate it, you always grow
with it for some reason. And then you miss that hate.
You weren't there and neither was I. But she was there the whole
time. She was there the last fifteen years every day excluding Wednesday
because weddy day was her day off seeing this man slowly deteriorate.
Deteriorate into a wake mouth swallow piss shit phaze out watching
the soaps and then whatever happened to be on CBS and then sleep
again. Most of the time it wasn't asleep but half the time it wasn't
awake either. It was that kind of in between area when nobody knew
what to call it but maybe the drueling stage of consciousness.
Let's go ahead and make the person a woman. Replace all the he's
with she's I'm sure as hell not going to do it for you.
She'd be 88 if she was alive right now. If she was alive, she finally
died. And everyone at her funeral was there. But at this time she
was quite yet to be dead.
Was she was in that DSOc (drueling stage of consciousness) she would
smoke these cigarettes. She had been smoking since the age of 14.
That's what they did in those days in the big city. They all smoked
early. And not all the studies had been done on them how much damage
those 'ciggs' were doing to those people. Nobody knew. And most
people didn't live long enough to see anyway.
She grew up in Chicago. Had a kid at 16. She grew up in Indiana.
And her kid had a kid at 16. She grew up in Indiana. And her kid
had a kid at 20. He grew up in Detroit. And I am that kid.
They always say how hard the Depression was. Every cent every dime
families accounted for. She had lots of pennies and dimes now and
she kept them so that the old folks home could take them away.
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